No milk for breakfast, that’s ok we’ll just have toast today. One son doesn’t want to go school, no problem encourager mom to the rescue. Another son’s interrupting every single conversation my husband and I are trying to have. No big deal I just patiently tell him to brush his teeth.
What I’m really thinking is- “he won’t be able to talk with a toothbrush in his mouth”.
Then I realize we are also out of dog food, the sink is piled with dishes and there is a broken glass in the broken dishwasher that is now being used as a very expensive drying rack. One son can’t find underwear, and another can’t find jeans. I now inform my precious ones that they will either find said clothes or go to school naked, but either way they will be in that car on time.
Encourager mom has now left the building and the new mom who has taken her place has even the pets running in fear.
At this point I’m beginning to unravel, one tiny thread at a time. My plan of mother of the year will have to begin again tomorrow.
It’s amazing to me that even after determining in my heart to remain understanding, patient and kind, I can become defeated by 7am.
Now I realize I do have a choice in this. My reactions to the day’s events are all on me, and today my regret list is rapidly growing.
I started out good, I really did, and then inch by inch little things started adding up. None of which were life changing. None are that important. However, each has stolen a little piece of my patience, and I have turned a corner.
Philippians 4:6 says “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
Had I done this? The truth is I had gotten so caught up in all I had to do and all that was happening this morning that I didn’t take the time to go to God. I skipped the only thing that could have helped me.
As I sit here typing I am thinking of Paul. In Acts chapter 16 we see a picture of him in jail. He had been stripped, severely beaten, placed in the inner parts of the jail and had his feet placed in the stocks. His attitude in this situation sets me back a bit. The bible says that at midnight he sings, and not a halfhearted song, but a song of true heartfelt worship that actually shakes the shackles right off- literally.
You see, when we truly come to God in all our moments, with all our hearts; when we worship Him with everything we have even when it hurts, things in our lives change. The shackles that are holding us down and stealing our joy- they have to go.
Let’s pause for a minute and reflect on my morning… Here I am losing my cool over a couple of half- naked kids and some dirty dishes. As I step back and really begin to breathe, I realize my mistake. I put all of my peace in my routine. I wasn’t worshiping in the storm, I was worshiping the storm. I am choosing now to take a new breath, to yet again change course, and get things back on track. I am going to pray and bring all these things before God, and then I’m going to worship with my whole heart.
It’s now a bit after 7am and I’m starting over today. I have God, I’m still breathing, and I just noticed that my husband has dressed the kids.
See, things are already looking up. I’m praying yours looks up too.